Diocletian in Edmonton

This is an account of my days and ways, of my life here in Edmonton.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Empress of the World...

...as in Fortune, for all you folks who didn't know: Fortuna Imperatrix Mundi. Fortune Empress of the World.

Anyway, how have I been, O gentle readers? I have been all right, I suppose.

That fellow who robbed me has been sentenced to a long spell in a juvenile correction facility. It isn't exactly what I would like to see, but the parole official who called me mentioned that he had committed similar robberies a number of times before, and that other times he has been given non-jail sentences that he's only skipped out on.

Work's been getting me down periodically. Perhaps I'm too soft hearted to be a survey machine? Perhaps I'm not as glib as I could be? Perhaps I don't believe in the Statscan mission fervently enough to pass on its urgency to the misfortunate farmers and ranchers whom I'm usually calling?

I've applied to a position at an organisation that I've volunteered at for a number of years. It would be a good way out to something better, except that a Certain Person, who shall remain nameless, is trying to deepsix it in favour of someone else. I just hate being screwed because of a stupid old boys'/girls' club. That organisation in particular is very bad for that, in spite of any good qualities that it may have.

(the above was a large rant, but I have to be careful who sees what, so it was heavily re-edited. Ask me if you want more details/a rant.)

In other matters of my life... My housemates seem well, as do my parents and my sister's family. I have been drawn into a couple of other, rather personal, concerns, which have led to me putting some of my IWW and co-op stuff on the back burner.

Romatically, there have been a lot of... things. I don't know where things are going, really, since I don't really know where the other person wants to go, and I don't think that she necessarily knows. All I can say is that the heart is a multi-chambered organ. I don't want to push too hard, because she's got a lot to adjust to, coming back to Canada, and I think that she's got some concerns, too (and maybe she's just that into me?). On the other hand, I don't want to seem too uninterested, either. On the bright side, I will be able to meet this person soon, Fortune willing. That's very exciting. I pray the anticipation will be worth it, but I'm also quite apprehensive.

I really hope that her trip home goes well.

Ah, and I've taken walks. One walk in particular:

In a meditative mood I trudged along, following my nose. I felt melancholy that evening, and wanted to somehow cheer myself up. I wantedsome new thing, some new beauty. The evening, with the world slowlyturning orange and pink, perfumed by the heavy scent of lilac, seemed a surfeit of beauty, but I didn't need too much, I needed way too much.

Feeling the dampness of evening on the air, I went south instead of myusual north. I turned west. Critically, I chose not to loop north again but meander south instead, and...I encountered a whole new world, a whole area of the river valley which I had not yet visited. I crossed the road, strode along the grass, and came upon the edge of the valley, which was so steep that it seemed like a cliff. The trees had been cleared away for a short space, and it reminded me of the toboggan hills when I was a kid. I walked along the edge of thevalley further, enjoying other views, and came across a staircase leading down. Out of curiosity (there are lots such in Edmonton, of course), I descended. It seemed a more woody area of the Valley, and I liked it. It seemed thick and really intense. One could smell the forest, I wandered up close to the river....The staircase went down a long way. I looked around for a bit, then cameback up. It felt like the walk up was infinite, that I had descended from and was now returning to a different world.

An old guy on motorblades whizzed past the bicycle path when I got up, assuring me that there was lots of room.I went back north, and stumbled across the loveliest park bench overlooking the valley. There are lots of such park benches in Edmonton, but this seemed special. It was a bit more secluded, and the way the waning sunlight coloured the bridge it overlooked, and the trees, was wonderful. It looked out over a lot of trees and growth. I almost forgot that I was at the edge of a city. I felt at home somehow. I pondered alot of things in my life, mulling over my future, my past. I felt melancholy and elated at the same time.The sun was turning the bridge pink, the river purple. I wanted to stay longer, but I had to get up for work (and to call someone) and besides it was getting dark. The bench was dedicated to a young man by his family who died at an early age. There were lots of dogs being walked that evening, mostly big dogs, but some small ones too.

It was a beautiful night.

Over and out, fellow cybernauts!

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